My Texan Said I Need a Cowboy Hat

But I’m a Yankee, so I need more

My Texan husband has a cowboy hat, cowboy boots, and a cowboy belt with a nice Texan buckle. He’s a Texan. These are required.

He plopped his hat on my head today and said I look good in it and need one for myself. I had to speak up.

“Look, y’all, I’m not a Texan. I’m as Yankee as a person can get. My ancestors on both sides of my mother’s family were here when the US was still a bunch of colonies. They fought in the Revolutionary War, on the Colonial side.

“We fought for the North in the Civil War. I’m from New York state as far back as then. Not New York City, mind you — good farmer stock in upstate New York. Yes, we also had cows and boys but not together. We milked our cows; we didn’t herd them. Our cows were gently treated.

“If I need to get a cowboy hat, it has to reflect my Northern roots. If you can find me one with a tiara on it, I’ll wear it.”

Lo and behold:

Surely, we can find anything on the internet that we could possibly dream up. Not only does that tiara sparkle — it lights up. Not only does it light up — it lights up in different patterns.

And it will be delivered the day before we leave for the Fox Family Reunion in Harper’s Ferry.

Who says you can’t embarrass your kids, even when they’re in their 40's?