My sister bonded with my mother; I spent the first nine months of my life with my aunt and grandmother and bonded with them. My mother never liked me very much, and my sister (who is five and a half years younger than I am) had the same attitude--unless they needed something from me. My mother is long gone, and my sister lost her eyesight 10 years ago. She is better now, more mellow, but although we speak two or three times a week on the phone, we never say, "I love you" when we say good-bye. My cousins and I always do. Life is what it is. I'm sorry for your suffering. My mother was not an alcoholic. She had a series of nervous breakdowns during her life.